Humortråden

Gi meg styrke...!

At det er mulig..!
Neste blir vel at jordbær er ekkelt fordi man må spise frøene.... Skrelle jordbæret anyone? Haha...
 
Ja, det er mye å lære i den tråden. Kjøtt er ikke muskler, kun om det er knuter i det. Egg er muskler for det har vi lært på skolen, det samme er hjerne, mens fisk ikke er muskler, ihvertfall ikke frossenfisk slik som vegetarianere spiser. Det er ikke lov å ta livet av ville dyr under jakt, de må gjøres på slakteri. Høns har ører.
 
Å GUD!!! Jeg føler meg pinlig berørt på vegene av mitt kjønn!! :D Bare for og supplere dette....:p
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Haha, dette er både kult og moro :D The Roots på akkompagnement, med skoleinstrumenter.

[video=youtube;lEsPhTbJhuo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEsPhTbJhuo[/video]
 
Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white Robe. "Who the hell are you?" demanded Dave, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?"

The mysterious man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter." Dave was stunned "You mean I'm dead!?!! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family. You've got to send me back straight away."

St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen." Dave was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.

A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.
"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?" "It's not so bad" replies Dave, "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode." "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?" "Never!" replies Dave. "Well just relax and let it happen"

So he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail.
An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him... ever!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting... "Dave, wake up you drunken bastard! You've shit the bed!".
 
For those that don't know him, Major General Peter Cosgrove is an Australian.

MajorGeneralPeterCosgrove.jpg


General Cosgrove was interviewed on the radio recently.

Read his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children.

Regardless of how you feel about gun laws you have to love this! This is one of the best comeback lines of all time.


A portion of an ABC radio interview between a female broadcaster and General Cosgrove who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military Headquarters is below.


FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
So, General Cosgrove, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?

GENERAL COSGROVE:!
We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?

GENERAL COSGROVE:
I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?

GENERAL COSGROVE:
I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER:
But you're equipping them to become violent killers.

GENERAL COSGROVE:
Well, Ma'am, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you?

The radiocast went silent for 46 seconds and when it returned, this interview was over...
 
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