Humortråden
- Trådstarter Stipey
- Opprettet
Dagens nerdevits for de som husker et snev av latingrammatikken 
A Roman walks into a bar and orders a Martinus.
The bartender says, "Uh, sir, do you mean a Martini?"
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double I would have said so!"
Then the bartender looks toward the Roman's friend and asks what he would like. That Roman holds up two fingers and says, "I'd like five beers, please."
A Roman walks into a bar and orders a Martinus.
The bartender says, "Uh, sir, do you mean a Martini?"
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double I would have said so!"
Then the bartender looks toward the Roman's friend and asks what he would like. That Roman holds up two fingers and says, "I'd like five beers, please."
- Medlem
- 25. nov. 2008
- Innlegg
- 3.343
Sersjanten hadde fått inn et nytt kull rekrutter. Som vanlig syntes han at denne kontigenten var tidenes mest elendige, på alle måter. De var kommet et stykke ut i opplæringen og i dag var det om kamuflasje. "Som dere ser har hjelmen et grovmasket nett som man kan bruke til å kamuflere seg med. Er man i en granskog, stikker man noen granbar i nettet på hjelmen".
I bjørkeskog bruker man naturligvis noen bjørkekvister, naturligvis..! Dere skjønner vel såpass, ferskinger...?" "Når man skal åle seg gjennom en kornåker må man nødvendigvis dandere masse halm i hjelmens nett for å bli minst mulig synlig".
Sjersjanten fortsatte med et lite triumferende glis rundt munnen: "Hvis kompaniet skal passere en kålåker mest mulig usett, kan dere bare ta av hjelmen og holde hodet lavt."
I bjørkeskog bruker man naturligvis noen bjørkekvister, naturligvis..! Dere skjønner vel såpass, ferskinger...?" "Når man skal åle seg gjennom en kornåker må man nødvendigvis dandere masse halm i hjelmens nett for å bli minst mulig synlig".
Sjersjanten fortsatte med et lite triumferende glis rundt munnen: "Hvis kompaniet skal passere en kålåker mest mulig usett, kan dere bare ta av hjelmen og holde hodet lavt."
Kohe321
Støttemedlem
- Medlem
- 19. okt. 2011
- Innlegg
- 5.367
- Medlem
- 25. nov. 2008
- Innlegg
- 3.343
Lang og kjip dag på skolen, da er det greit og komme hjem til denne i inboxen!
[video=youtube;8pQAWOCofXo]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pQAWOCofXo[/video]
[video=youtube;8pQAWOCofXo]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pQAWOCofXo[/video]
Stakar Engelskmennene da. Får vist ikke lov å til å leke ute da det blir under 20 blå.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2568384/British-soldiers-banned-training-snowy-conditions-Norwegian-base-health-safety-rules-deem-COLD.html
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2568384/British-soldiers-banned-training-snowy-conditions-Norwegian-base-health-safety-rules-deem-COLD.html
Siden det er fredag......
(Snart søndag og litt religiøs humor kan være på sin plass?)
To raske!
************************************************************
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed
out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women," she charged.
"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on
earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by
someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs!"
************************************************************
Blonde paint job
---------------------------
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
****************************************************
(Snart søndag og litt religiøs humor kan være på sin plass?)
To raske!
************************************************************
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed
out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women," she charged.
"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on
earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by
someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs!"
************************************************************
Blonde paint job
---------------------------
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
****************************************************
[video=youtube;3_cKTw8cB78]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_cKTw8cB78[/video]
[video=youtube;WApuXPDR5Q0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WApuXPDR5Q0[/video]
[video=youtube;WApuXPDR5Q0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WApuXPDR5Q0[/video]
- Medlem
- 23. mars 2011
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- 398
- Medlem
- 25. nov. 2008
- Innlegg
- 3.343
Så het han Per også!
[video=youtube;t7v_TYQmAsI]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7v_TYQmAsI[/video]